I did it this way, I did it my way
Pain or pleasure
There’s this saying there are two basic motivators that make you do things. Either you do something to avoid pain, or else you do it to gain pleasure. I started painting with my moon blood as a means to delve deeper into the pain of loss (trying to avoid it would become bigger or worse). And at the same time it rewarded me, because I was positively surprised not only with the outcome but also with the insights, the support and the comfort the process of creating menstrual art offered me. (continues below the pictures)
Curiosity and despair
Next to pain and pleasure there were more factors at play. For one, I was curious. Seeing other women doing this triggered something in me ranging from utter excitement to slight disgust. My relationship with my womb and my menstruation so far wasn’t a happy or not even an understanding one. Yet, the idea excited me. I just had to give it a try.
Moreover, my curiosity found an ally in my despair. When it became clear that I would not be able to be a mother in this life, I so desperately wanted to create something tangible coming from my womb that it seemed the most obvious and natural thing to start painting with my moon blood.Â
A growing collection
The more I collected my blood and the more I painted with it, the bigger my pile of paintings became. Together with that pile, my dream to one day create an artzine got bigger too.
An artzine is a self-published booklet (magazine like) showing artworks and illustrations, and it can have texts too. It offers an infinite freedom to artists to entirely design and shape it the way they want and suites their art. And that’s exactly why I dreamed of creating one.
That’s how I came up with the idea to turn this specific pile of paintings into an artzine, more specifically into a MenstruZine.
(continues below the pictures)
My very first MenstruZine
The entire process of making this MenstruZine first and foremost was a way for me to give guidance to a grieving process. What helped a lot was knowing the result could be something physical. Something I could touch and hold in my hands, look at with my eyes, and cherish for as long as I need to. Obviously, the insights and the comfort I gained from working on it will remain forever in my heart.
So, I hereby proudly present my very first artzine, my ever so special MenstruZine!
I did it my way
While I was putting everything together, I noticed my paintings are telling a story. I didn’t add too much narrative though and let them speak for themselves accompanied by the poems that came with them at the time of creation.
In the back, there’s a short section on how I tackled the practicalities of painting with moon blood.
As with everything, certain art isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay. But if you feel inspired or curious, or you just like my art and/or want to support me, then I have good news for you: you can buy your copy in the Art Shop!
Expressing how life runs through my veins… I do it my way.
With love,
Frouke
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